There is really just one scripture needed to clear up the myth that marriage takes work. In my previous post I tried to make a rational argument to dispel the foolishness. Unfortunately, I don’t think I swayed everyone so this time I’m going to try a different approach. I’ll still be rational but focus on the Bible for reasoning, starting with Genesis 2:20-25 (NIV).
20 …But for Adam no suitable helper was found. 21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” 24 That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. 25 Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
Gen. 2:20-25 (NIV)
Marriage doesn’t require work, marriage requires sleep. It’s pretty clear that, in the beginning of mankind, God determined that man and woman would be better off together. So, He put Adam to sleep, created a woman out of man and gave them the opportunity to (re)unite as one. For Adam’s part, he went to sleep and woke up with his bride. He was happy, unashamed and didn’t have to do any work.
Ok, I can hear some still saying that they aren’t convinced. They are saying that work still existed it just happened after the marriage between Adam and Eve. Those same people would refer to the scriptures to prove that, after Adam’s sin, marriage became a decaying, fallible construct that must be propped up by hard work. So let’s go to the scripture.
v20…But for Adam no suitable helper was found…
I love that God sets the tone and the basis for companionship here. In previous scriptures God recognizes that man needs companionship that can only come from a creation equal to him. Adam has a whole world, filled with things and ultimate power, yet he is unfulfilled, alone without a mate.
v21…so the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep…
The deep sleep is important because we know that Adam is not aware of God’s plans. He creates the animals, every beast and every bird, and brings them to Adam to identify. Adam doesn’t see God create Eve but, when she is presented to Adam, he identifies her as himself. It is Adam that sees Eve and says, “this is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh”.
v22…then the Lord God made a woman from the rib He had taken out of the man…
We tend to think of marriage as an optional state to be pursued later in life. Sure, we are born single and some have the ‘gift’ to remain that way. But God’s Word suggests that singleness is the optional state and marriage, as described in Genesis, is a return to wholeness.
v23…for she was taken out of man…
Many times in the book of Genesis God equates man and woman, “male and female created he them” but this is the clearest illustration. Where God created male and female animals, beasts of the field and birds of the air, He made mankind differently. He blew His breath of life into one man, Adam, then pulled every other man and woman out of Adam. In marriage, my wife is me and I am her and we are equal. On Earth, we are all Adam, equal, and subject to the same rights and rewards.
v24…that is why a man leaves his father and mother…
We all know people who have gotten married but have not left their father or their mother. The Bible says here that if we find our equal, the one who is a part of us, then we will leave our parents. We no longer need our father to be the man in our lives or our mother to be the woman in our lives. We have captured the masculine and feminine parts of ourselves and have found sufficiency and completeness.
v25…Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame…
It’s euphoric to be naked with your spouse, laid bare, fully open and without pretense. It’s even better to be those things without feeling any hindrance of shame, to know that it’s right to have one person to be naked with. It seems like the only way they could have achieved that is if they had their own world. The king and queen of The Garden, never to be ashamed.
If you view the creation and union of Adam and Eve as the first marriage, you have to see the beautiful irony in its comparison to mankind’s view of marriage. Where we are told to work, Adam went to sleep. Where we are told to find our wives, God puts Eve directly in Adam’s path and lets him discover her. Where we follow rules of engagement in dating and in marriage, Adam and Eve simply stand together naked and unashamed. All of these things required some effort by Adam and Eve. But none of the core tenets of their successful union required work.